You may be the lighthouse they need
Have you seen Big Hero 6? If not, spoiler alert: So . . . Disney knows how to give us feelings. Oh man. To kick off the movie, the big brother runs into the burning building because he thinks someone is trapped inside it. And in a sudden explosion, he dies. Because that’s what happens…
Can you love humans AND cut people off?
How do you feel about these two “truths?” Deep down, everyone is just human, with their insecurities and feelings, needing love and, as a human, no matter how broken, worthy of love.Some people are toxic, narcissistic, cruel, and unloving, and permanently ending your relationship with them is the healthiest choice. I bet most of us…
What we got wrong about love
I don’t remember what game we were playing, or what this little boy was having a tough time with, but I remember like it was yesterday watching his father get more and more frustrated, eventually losing his temper and snapping at his sweet little boy. They were on a team and they were losing and…
Hiding
Sometimes the things you’re afraid to let people see because you think they’ll judge you end up being the very things they really love about you.
In your closest relationships, is the real you even there?
Driving home the other day, something struck me while I was listening to Nora McInerny’s (amazing) podcast (that you should listen to) Terrible, Thanks For Asking. In an episode called Don’t You Want Somebody to Take Care of You?, a woman named Gina recalled growing up with a depressed mother. Each morning her mom would…
Love, adventure, grief, and Willoughby
Shortly before he died, we said the name “Lincoln” again, not sure why. Willoughby’s head turned quickly. That’s my name. That was my name. Why did you say my old name? I don’t know what memories flooded Willoughby’s mind in that moment. Just that his head cocked differently. Maybe it brought him back one last…
To a little kid, little hurts are big and real
I want to speak up for a group of people that can’t really speak up for themselves. A group of little people. People who don’t get taken too seriously when they speak up. Because they’re “just” little kids. (Hey you, if you saw this title and clicked on this post because you were excited to…
Love
Love is not a finite resource. There isn’t a limited number of love things to pass around. Which means holding on tightly to the love inside you, instead of giving it away, isn’t the way to get love. At times I have felt like it is safest to not express all of the big love…
I’m free now
When I was a kid, I did have happy times. In fact a lot of my childhood memories feel happy. Even some of the stuff that, as an independent-minded adult, I now look back at as creepy or dysfunctional. I wish people understood that just because someone has some happiness, or feels like things are…
If I could send a message to 18-year-old me
Do you ever imagine what you’d say to younger-you if you had the chance? Life is really wonderful and beautiful and full of magic and excitement and love. But life is also weird for each one of us, sometimes a really tough kind of weird. The kind of weird that can make you feel lonely…
The problem with being good at running away from lions
Humans are good at running away from lions. (Like, yes, a lion’s gonna catch us, but we’re good at trying.) Danger equals adrenaline equals quick speedy fight or flight. Human bodies are good at this. Some people grow up running away from lions every single day. Lions that sound like dad yelling again or the…
A safe and meaningless love
If you carefully edit your identity so that you’ll be loved and accepted, and then the love and acceptance come, is it really yours, or does it belong to the caricature, and where does that leave you? So what would it take for your actual self to find love? ~ Wishing you courage to be…
Sad People
“Eeyore, the old grey Donkey, stood by the side of the stream, and looked at himself in the water.’Pathetic,’ he said. ‘That’s what it is. Pathetic.’He turned and walked slowly down the stream for twenty yards, splashed across it, and walked slowly back on the other side. Then he looked at himself in the water…
Monsters until you flip the light switch on
~ Happy Halloween! What or who did you think was a monster until you flipped your light switch on? When we think that a thing is dangerous, unknowable, or scary, and we try to not look at it, it stays scary. It’s why, as kids, we think the stuffed animal under our bed or the…
Standing up to bullying
You don’t need to be strong to stand up to bullying. You don’t need to be confident to stand up to bullying. It’s okay if your hands are shaking and you’re choking up. It’s okay if you are panicking. It’s okay if you have to write yourself a script and practice your words a bunch…
What you focus on
For the first time when I was about seventeen, I noticed a Dodge Charger. Bright red, powerful looking, muscle from bumper to bumper. Wow, I thought, here is a unique and beautiful car. I must have one. Over the next couple weeks, half the population seemed to share my revelation and purchase their own Dodge…
I have anxiety and that’s okay
I have anxiety. Some days I am in the zone, killing it. I am a manager and I’m good at it. I am great at sales and customer service. I am great at leading projects. I am the president of a Toastmasters club and I think I’m a good leader. I am a really good…
Attention-seeking
What if half our problem is that we’re not asking for attention? Junko is a handful, but she’s not complicated. She is a 2-year-old very-puppy who has no qualms about putting her foot down (literally–like on top of us) when she needs . . . . . or even just “wants” attention. (Is there really…
Why Can’t You Talk About It?
Countless times, I’ve heard people say “I can’t say it” or “I can’t talk about it”–or worst of all, “I’m not supposed to tell anyone.” Who says??? With a very few obvious exceptions (like corporate information that makes your company competitive or like national security and military secrets), you CAN talk about anything you feel you…
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