Authentic, but like right now

I always armed the alarm system at night. If someone beat me to it, I’d find some need to go grab something from the garage or step outside so that I could re-arm it when I came back in. Arming it took a minute, because we had to bypass a few upstairs bedroom windows so we could let in the fresh night air. When I re-armed…

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When it feels like too much

A soft, fuzzy mommy with no food. Or a wire mommy with food. Which would you pick? In a 1958 experiment by the scientist Harry Harlow, baby monkeys gravitated heavily toward the soft, fuzzy mommy with no food. Comfort and security mattered the most. Like even more than dinner. And not much matters more than dinner. We humans seem wired to desperately seek and hold onto…

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Willoughwaves

Waddling’s the word for the way Willoughby walked. Willoughwaddles. He was an old man when we adopted him. But as slowly and arthritically as he moved 95% of the time, he was still ready for an occasional mad dash when we played hide and seek, or to stand his ground like the Rock of Gibraltar when he wasn’t done sniffing a tree trunk. The first time…

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Your imperfect help

It’s like seeing the Grand Canyon for the first time. You look over the edge, and it goes . . . down . . . and down . . . and it just keeps going. You try to follow it across to the other side, and there is just too much. It’s . . . indescribably BIG. I always thought I was a good writer. I…

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Willoughby

I don’t have many words these days. Life goes on, when someone you love dies, and that’s so frustrating. I want the world to stop for a minute. Or at least I want to take a step away from it all for a minute, but unfortunately I still have to get groceries and go to work and say hello back to people. And all those people…

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Cut yourself some slack, it’s just how brains work

Sights, sounds, smells, and all those senses enter the brain through something called the thalamus. The thalamus passes this mix of sensations in two directions: The amygdala and the frontal cortex. The amygdala keeps you alive by freaking out about stuff. It quickly checks with the hippocampus to see if the new information might remind us of any yucky stuff that’s happened to us in the…

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Letting things float away and trusting they’ll float back if they’re yours

When I finally commit to writing something, I end up scrapping or shelving it more than one out of every ten times. That ratio has actually been climbing. It reminds me that the braggable stuff in life is only a part of it. It feels like some wisdom received from experience, that says: You don’t have to always get it right. You don’t have to always…

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As long as they know I’m trying my best

I dedicate this post to my fellow survivors (current or future) of “As-long-as-people-know-I’m-doing-my-best” syndrome. It’s okay if people don’t think you’re a good person. It really is. Some people will. For sure. In fact, the way this world is set up means that the only way to be the person some people like is to be the person some people hate. It’s . . . weird.…

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Does today count?

Does today need a certain quality, a certain worthwhileness, before it really counts? You know the days that count. When you trekked the windy miles to that mountain peak. When you started that job you’d been studying for and searching for since you were 20. When you cheers’d a glass of wine over a fancy dinner on that last dreamy night of your honeymoon. Life is…

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Would I still have been safe?

Oh hey my American friend. I wake up to the same headlines you do. I grew up on the same stories you did. I’ve learned roughly the same stuff as you about threats and expectations and stereotypes and all that jazz. You and I both have a general idea of what it means to live in America. And it’s the spoken or unspoken reality of what…

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“Will I ever get better?” can be a dangerous question

Will I be ever be able to get over my anxiety? Will the back pain ever go away? Will I beat this addiction once and for all? Will not having a family ever stop hurting? Will I ever get past this struggle? Will I ever recover? Will I ever be healed? I think when we identify a problem–a struggle, an injury, a trauma–that moment we realize…

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In your closest relationships, is the real you even there?

Driving home the other day, something struck me while I was listening to Nora McInerny’s (amazing) podcast (that you should listen to) Terrible, Thanks For Asking. In an episode called Don’t You Want Somebody to Take Care of You?, a woman named Gina recalled growing up with a depressed mother. Each morning her mom would retreat to her bedroom, leaving the kids to fend for themselves.…

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A safe and meaningless love

If you carefully edit your identity so that you’ll be loved and accepted, and then the love and acceptance come, is it really yours, or does it belong to the caricature, and where does that leave you? So what would it take for your actual self to find love? ~ Wishing you courage to be yourself, friend! If you could use some weekly reminders to value…

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But is it REALLY okay?

#makeitok is a hashtag for those of us who want to end the stigma around mental illness. For those of us who want talking about and attending to mental health to be a normal, accepted, an “ok” part of life. In the last few years I’ve been really impressed by the differences in the shapes and sizes of the bodies in advertising. Even cellulite is allowed…

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3 quotes to fuel brave souls

Good morning friend, I hope that today you honor the passion and truth inside you and bring your actual self wherever you go. Maybe these three thoughts will help fuel your bravery: What is that thing you dream of? What if you didn’t give it up? Why don’t you think it’s good enough? What if you acknowledged the negative voices and said “but this is still…

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Living for more time

Time is a weird and inevitable thing. If we get to the end of our lives having spent the whole thing fighting time, we will have lost. If we spend our days wishing we were younger, refusing to accept changes, we will always be feeling hurt and scared and defeated. If our deepest need is for time to not pass, to not grow old and die,…

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Whose life are you living?

We humans do this weird thing. When my adorable dog Willoughby wants something, he wants it. He doesn’t check, first, whether we want him to want it. He doesn’t wait to see if we’re okay with him wanting it. He doesn’t try to align his deepest desires with what he supposes that we may want him to want. He doesn’t try to guess what our vision…

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Glacier Adventure

Glacier National Park. My favorite.* (*at least for today) There are things in nature that I love with every little bit of my heart. Big mountains. Cold flowing water. Tall trees. And all the all the all the green. Glacier is the ultimate mix between massive mountains and walkable woods. For some hikers, the cold rugged ridges of the Colorado or Canadian Rockies, soaring close to…

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We need you

What is waiting inside of you that the world needs? What love is waiting to be expressed? What music is waiting to be felt? What words are waiting to be heard? What art is waiting to move people? What stories are waiting to be told? What would be the harm in showing up for the world? We need you.

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Is the world a dangerous place?

Woman Smiles and Waves at Stranger Hard-Working Cashier Promoted to Management Local Man Reports He Still Has Wonderful Relationship with His Family Single Mother Laid Off but Is Doing Fine with the Assistance of Unemployment and other Support Nobody Was Murdered In City Today Group of Friends Really Enjoy Laughing Together Every Week on Game Night These are a few headlines we will never read. Because…

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Loneliness, stillness, and a North Shore adventure

It’s good to just go sometimes. Adventure is always within reach. The earth is bigger than your stress. Nature is cleansing. You’re allowed to take care of yourself. “Ever more people today have the means to live, but no meaning to live for.” ~ Viktor Frankl “With shortness of breathYou explained the infiniteAnd how rare and beautiful it is to even exist”~ Saturn, Sleeping at Last…

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Your disappearing place

Where is your disappearing place? What place makes you remember your freedom, your self, your own breath? Where can you truly feel “away from it all” for a soul-filling minute?

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My 200th post!

NOW can I call myself a writer? What passion of yours do you discredit because you haven’t done it long enough, well enough, fast enough, professionally enough, famously enough? The thing that bubbles up from deep inside your soul is YOU, whether a thousand people know it or just you. If you ever, ever, ever find yourself biting your tongue when the words “I’m a [thing-er]”…

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You may be the lighthouse they need

Have you seen Big Hero 6? If not, spoiler alert: So . . . Disney knows how to give us feelings. Oh man. To kick off the movie, the big brother runs into the burning building because he thinks someone is trapped inside it. And in a sudden explosion, he dies. Because that’s what happens in Disney movies: The characters love so much they’ll give up…

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Before you break down

You hit a wall, so you start doing “self-care.” Quiet time, journaling, fresh air, running, couch time, cookies, lots of bed, therapy, warm baths, PTO days, sharing your sadness with a friend. . . . It becomes a top priority in your schedule because it has to, because you’re breaking down. Are you allowed to prioritize (read “absolutely insist on”) self-care when you’re not breaking down?…

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Letting the waves do their thing

Think back. Remember vulnerable-you. At your weakest, your most drained, your most crushed. What did it? “Trauma” is a universal experience. Your life may not have been dominated by it, but you’ve had your days. Younger me found refuge in my bedroom closet. I’d spend hours in there. It felt a little safer. Have you ever heard yourself say “I just want to hide under a…

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Why nobody can hear the alarm anymore, and what you and I can do about it today

There’s a reason it seems nearly impossible these days that our country could deal decisively with a genuinely dangerous or unfit leader. It has to do with the way you and I speak every day. Our problem, if we can stand a little self-reflection, is that you and I habitually label as “dangerous” or “unfit” EVERY SINGLE PERSON with a perspective significantly different from our own.…

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You ARE you

A while ago I wrote a short and simple blog post called “It’s okay to be you.” I wonder if adding another way of thinking about it could help: You just ARE you. Period. Whether it’s okay or not (and it is), you are you. If you are an anxious you, a distracted you, a busy you, a depressed you, a frustrated you, an over-achieving you,…

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I’m free now

When I was a kid, I did have happy times. In fact a lot of my childhood memories feel happy. Even some of the stuff that, as an independent-minded adult, I now look back at as creepy or dysfunctional. I wish people understood that just because someone has some happiness, or feels like things are also good, or has some of what they need (like food…

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10 thoughts for your new year :)

Hi human. At the end of a year, I like reflecting. Appreciating. Celebrating. This year, I’m feeling happy about and thankful for and excited by my 7 years of blogging–how it’s grown, growing . . . I feel proud of myself, which didn’t used to be allowed. And I feel so, so, so thankful for all my friends–personally familiar or connected only by our shared humanity–who…

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What is your Christmas like?

Christmas is supposed to be a time for feeling safety and love and togetherness. Right? What is your Christmas like, though? What is it really like? Some of us have had that love and belonging that has made Christmas merry. And some of us have instead had mostly loneliness, rejection, confusion, and hurt. I bet that for most, it’s a mix. So if, even alongside some…

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This WEIRD holiday season

Humans infect each other through smiles and embraces. “Cheer” is a word about the holidays. And Cheer is just the greatest condition to be infected with. Each year, sometime in October or November, we hear rumblings of Christmas music. Cheer is on its way. Soon we start putting parties and get-togethers on the calendar. We browse to find the perfect gifts, picturing the glow we will…

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Emotional on purpose

Non-rational corners of the brain get little respect. We are supposed to be “smart” creatures, do what “makes sense,” “think carefully.” And yes to all that. And also yes to purposefully manufacturing feelings and emotions that access the more primitive corners of the brain and have nothing to do with logic and sensibility. Here’s what I mean. “People often say that motivation doesn’t last,” Zig Ziglar…

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What about your own oxygen mask?

I write. That is what I do. All the time. Sometimes I hear from a friend, or someone I don’t know at all, that my words made a difference for them–made them feel understood, not alone, inspired them. And that is why I write. When I write, life makes more sense to me, and I feel the big feelings like thankfulness or courage or determination, and…

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Wishes for 2021

My wish for 2021: That it will be a year of LOVE. In 2021, we will listen more. In 2021, we will surround ourselves with people who look and think and sound and live and celebrate and feel and act differently than we do. In 2021, we will work together with people who are not like us (but really just like us). In 2021, we will…

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Why Halloween

I think Halloween is an underappreciated Holiday. Not in every way. It’s many people’s favorite, because how fun to dress up, etc. But I mean what Halloween is actually about–the stuff of life behind the Holiday that the day puts us in touch with, even if accidentally and only a little bit. “The farther we’ve gotten from the magic and mystery of our past, the more…

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The magic of conversation

How many unsaid things do you have simmering inside of you? Saying things out loud helps in so many ways. It helps us think through things, solidify things, feel things, get over things. Sometimes just letting out a frustration makes it stop hurting, or putting an anxiety into words suddenly reveals its harmlessness. Many of us learn what we believe and care about by talking through…

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I hope that you will be gentle with yourself

Imagine you’re holding the hand of a little child, seeing tears brim in their eyes. Frustrated. Embarrassed. Not good enough. How delicately will you hold that child’s heart in your hands? What will you say? How gentle will you be with their sensitive little heart? This child needs love and support. You would be gentle and kind with them, wouldn’t you? With them. With yourself, on the…

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The cost of fixating

What is something you really want that you CAN’T have right now? I’m not running right now, and it’s driving me crazy. In any given year, if you asked me to list my top 5 favorite things in life, “Running” would be somewhere on that list. I never want to not run. Unfortunately, these last couple years have been sort of on-again-off-again for me as a…

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The problem with being good at running away from lions

Humans are good at running away from lions. (Like, yes, a lion’s gonna catch us, but we’re good at trying.) Danger equals adrenaline equals quick speedy fight or flight. Human bodies are good at this. Some people grow up running away from lions every single day. Lions that sound like dad yelling again or the cool kids taunting you again or your relationships failing you again…

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What you focus on

For the first time when I was about seventeen, I noticed a Dodge Charger. Bright red, powerful looking, muscle from bumper to bumper. Wow, I thought, here is a unique and beautiful car. I must have one. Over the next couple weeks, half the population seemed to share my revelation and purchase their own Dodge Chargers. They were everywhere. You get what I mean, right? You…

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Why not both?

“Wolde ye bothe eate your cake, and haue your cake?” ~ John Heywood, 1546, in his book, A dialogue conteinyng the nomber in effect of all the prouerbes in the english tongue “You can’t have your cake and eat it, too.” I’ve actually never appreciated this old proverb. It’s not that I think it’s wrong, just that I think we apply it far too often. The idea…

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The lifelong freedom of not needing approval

I say lifelong for a reason. Approval feels really wonderful, so it’s hard not to fall back into living for approval after we’ve once found freedom. When you find independence, you chase the things you’re genuinely interested in, the stuff you really believe in. And then that new version of life brings you new approval from new approvers. People that love you for who you are now. Only, those…

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2 impactful things to do every day–ONLY 2

The other day I sat down and wrote a schedule that would help me actually do all the things I want to do every day, every week. I did that a while ago, too. And before that. And again and again and again. And it HAS HELPED. Every time. But it has never “worked” impeccably. Schedules, to-do lists, planning sessions–they’ve never guaranteed lasting consistency in my life. I’ve…

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Death

To my friend Peter F.You’re one of the tenderest souls the world has known.Be at peace.~ Death is yucky. It’s been on my mind this year. A lot. One of my first, best work-buddies died suddenly the other day. His name was Peter, too, and we used to set up a cup across the room and take turns trying to throw pens into it. We got…

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Western States Adventure

Well hey friends. :) It’s a weird year, and I’m guessing I’m not the only one who is missing more adventurous days. So if it helps, join me on a little virtual road trip to the West Coast and some other gorgeous destinations that direction. In fall 2017, Lyssi and I did our first real big outdoorsy adventure, along with our bestie/sister Brie. Since that first…

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Watching the clock

Almost done with work. Almost the weekend. Almost time to eat. Almost time to go. Almost bed time. Almost done with this workout. Almost done with classes. Then, it will be better. Someday. When all the stars have aligned, our lives will begin. In that perfect moment, we’ll be alive. We’ll be happy. We’ll want to be present. I’m sure I’m not the only one who falls…

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You still are and you still can

I am a world traveler. An explorer. An adventurer. Salty wind on a gloomy Scottish coast, with an order of fish and chips. Diesel smell from the red double-decker buses. Giant red Maple leaves painted on the airplanes, a little memory to remind me that I had technically been to Canada, even if it was more through. Little me still wants it to count. The palpable…

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Letting

How often do you stop struggling for a minute? We’re halfway through 2020. What have you learned so far about just sitting with things that just ARE, no matter whether you’d like them to be or not? Can you show up for the reality you’re actually in? Stop and breathe for a minute.

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Can you love humans AND cut people off?

How do you feel about these two “truths?” Deep down, everyone is just human, with their insecurities and feelings, needing love and, as a human, no matter how broken, worthy of love. Some people are toxic, narcissistic, cruel, and unloving, and permanently ending your relationship with them is the healthiest choice. I bet most of us would agree at least in some sense with each of…

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Tiny tiny tiny

Picture a map of the world. Do you see that tiny tiny tiny dot where you live? You and I are tiny tiny tiny creatures in a great big world. In August 2011, the Juno spacecraft, on its way to Jupiter, took pictures of the earth from one million miles away. Have you seen one of those pictures of our tiny tiny tiny earth? There is…

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Comfortable-to-Anti-Racist ratio

A lot of well-meaning Americans are scratching their heads and, their feelings a little hurt, saying “Hey wait, I’m not a racist!” And it’s true. Most Americans aren’t white supremacists. Most Americans think that being Black is as exactly, beautifully, perfectly human as being white. Sure, lots of us non-racists accidentally have some subconscious biases built into us and generally expect more mischief from Black people (and…

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No more looking the other way

A poetic quote has been making the rounds (not sure where it originated), relating to the pandemic: “We’re all in the same storm, but we’re not all in the same boat.” I think that’s as big as the rest of life, too, in every corner of the world. These words are not going to be enough. But I hope they help a little: I want to…

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Be the curly chip

Tortilla chips are made in a factory. Factories make things Just-Right. On a conveyor belt, the sheet of dough is cut by triangle-shaped molds, each mold identically sized and shaped, so that each chip will come out identical: Just-Right. Somewhere along the way, the chips fall in a fryer. A few of the chips get “weird”–some folding over on themselves. some attaching inseparably to another chip,…

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The coming “new normal”

My friend Madonna pointed out this morning that as cities and states across America gradually start opening back up, each in their unique way, we are going to start seeing what the real new normal will look like. For a long time, many people are going to be living in heightened caution. Wearing masks, avoiding large groups, hugging a little less (unfortunately), and the list goes…

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Real People

Every person is a real person. Meaning they’ve got the inspiring, smiley parts and the sad, scary parts. The person you’re really close to, the person you’ve never met, and even the person you really look up to as a sort of superhuman. And even yourself. It’s good to just think about this every once in a while. Can we accept the real person in each…

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See?!? I shouldn’t have . . .

Hindsight is not always 20/20. It’s hard not to judge our decisions and actions on a situation’s ultimate outcome. We pick A instead of B, the situation goes terribly wrong, and we think “See? I shouldn’t have picked A. I should have picked B instead.” This hindsight feels simple. But it’s not. It’s fuzzy and confusing. The world is a massive place teeming with a billion…

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Accept your pendulum

When we humans grow, we tend to resemble pendulums. If we were too this, we become, for a time, too that. And then we may become too this again, but a little less. And so the pendulum swings. It just happens. We cannot stop abruptly in the center, perfectly balanced, on the first go-round. Growth is messy. Your pendulum may have been wound way up from a lifetime of hurt, fear,…

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When life gets normal again

I have an idea. Get a piece of paper and write down some of your deepest thoughts from these lonely, scary, inspiring, deeply humanizing coronavirus days. Thoughts about yourself, about the world, about your neighbors and friends, about hope and kindness and sacrifice. Thoughts about what matters. Then bury it somewhere in your closet with all the boxes and bins of old stuff. A couple years…

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Big Bend Adventure

When I think of adventure, I think of Big Bend National Park. Nestled in the “big bend” on Texas’s southwest border with Mexico, Big Bend is the 7th largest national park in the contiguous United States. Despite its size, its remote location (4.5 hour drive from El Paso, 7.5 hour drive from Dallas) helps it remain a well kept secret. It sees less than 4% of…

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Don’t wait for all this to be over

Crisis. Fear. Risk. Danger. Change. Unknown. My natural reaction in a time of uncertainty, anxiety, or crisis is to put things “on hold.” You, too? Goals. Learning. Health. Exercise. Conversation. Causes. Projects. Healing. Big life changes. What have you put on hold in the last week of fear and change? And what would happen if you DIDN’T put it on hold? What would happen if you decided…

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Sit with the bad, then chase the good

Okay, I’m not going to pretend like this pandemic is a fun time, or “good.” It is awful. I have learned something about fear and sadness–not a new thing, psychologists have said it for years and years and years: Sit with it. Accept that shitty stuff is real. Acknowledge how hard it is. Feel the feelings. That’s not something we’re the best at, most of us.…

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This WEIRD Weekend

There is still that soft breeze you can feel touching your skin and blowing gently through your hair when you go outside. There is still that song that moves you deep inside every time you hear it. There is still that cup of coffee you make in the morning, the exact way you like to make it. There is still that friend you used to phone…

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Sidewalk

Nobody actually says–or at least nobody actually gets to say–that just because you’re a “grown up” now, you have to stick to the sidewalk. Hop up on the wall, if it’s calling your name, and teeter your way along in the sky above the sidewalk for a while. Or abandon the sidewalk entirely and crunch through the leaves as you venture into the woods. You are still…

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What we got wrong about love

I don’t remember what game we were playing, or what this little boy was having a tough time with, but I remember like it was yesterday watching his father get more and more frustrated, eventually losing his temper and snapping at his sweet little boy. They were on a team and they were losing and the little boy wasn’t playing well enough–and this, apparently, was a…

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namaste

What if every time you spoke to someone, you first stopped to remind yourself that the person you’re about to speak to is a human, just like you? With feelings, with needs, with scars, with longings, with heart . . . And that to be human is a miracle. Sometimes a powerful miracle. Sometimes a fragile miracle. What if every word you spoke–every look you gave–to…

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that negative voice

Every day, you can hear that voice: You can’t. You’re a fraud. You’re bad at. Nobody likes. You’re not brave enough. You’ll never. And every day, you can choose to let that voice be what it is–just a voice. Every day, you can acknowledge that negative voice you hear, and then choose to be yourself anyway: Your true self. Your brave self. Your new self. Your vulnerable…

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I can’t believe I . . .

When you look back on 5-years-ago, 10-years-ago, 20-years-ago you, often you feel a huge disconnect. And often a bit of shame or embarrassment. “I can’t believe I did/said/thought that.” Somebody somewhere now is doing/saying/thinking the same things you did/said/thought 5, 10, 20 years ago. And that person is where they are for a reason. That person is worthy of love, respect, understanding, and compassion. That’s easier…

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Santa Barbara Adventure

“What isn’t clear is why people always say ‘goes without saying,’ yet still feel compelled to say the thing that was supposed to go without saying. Doesn’t that bother you?” – Shawn Spencer, Psych When my adventure buddy asked me if I wanted to tag along to Santa Barbara, California, where she was headed for a 3-day certification program, it was an immediate omgYES for two…

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My Little Broken Buddha

My best friend gave me a little figurine of a meditating Buddha. Its head was still on. I meditate and I really like Buddhism. In a nutshell to me, it’s about letting go of our need for things to be just-so. Our first big excursion to the mountains since my last concussion, a long road trip to the Canadian Rockies. . . . I was really nervous…

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Free yourself from “good at”

What if you free yourself from the need to get “good at” something? The world is full of adventure–singing, making a story, rock-climbing, poetry, cooking, improv, skiing, paddle-boarding, reading confusing scientific studies, decorating a home, building a thing, volunteering, yoga, drawing, meditating, learning a language, hiking, trying Ethiopian food, spending a weekend photographing nature . . . I want to try writing a story this year..…

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I have anxiety and that’s okay

I have anxiety. Some days I am in the zone, killing it. I am a manager and I’m good at it. I am great at sales and customer service. I am great at leading projects. I am the president of a Toastmasters club and I think I’m a good leader. I am a really good friend to lots of people. I have gotten straight A’s in…

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Love is it.

It’s a new year, and I’m sitting at a coffee shop thinking about what I want to do as a writer this year. I want to grow. I want to get better at writing. I want to make more of an impact. I want to take it seriously. I want to chase the dreams I have about it. But what do I want to write about this…

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Goodbye 2019, Hello 2020!

Of all the years in my whole entire life, 2019 is the year that I’ve most often found myself telling someone, “It’s been a tough year.” But I’m going to miss 2019. The sad parts of a journal aren’t any less treasured memories than the happy parts. Each year is my story. At the end of a weird year, I’m struck by how unique each life…

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It always works out*

*Okay, life doesn’t always work out. Sometimes there’s just something truly tragic. But I’d venture to say that 95% of the time we think that life has taken such a bad turn that things just won’t work out–we end up being wrong. Try taking an inventory of your own experiences. They usually worked out–didn’t they? Even 2019. I think this is a very helpful thing to…

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Sad People

“Eeyore, the old grey Donkey, stood by the side of the stream, and looked at himself in the water.‘Pathetic,’ he said. ‘That’s what it is. Pathetic.’He turned and walked slowly down the stream for twenty yards, splashed across it, and walked slowly back on the other side. Then he looked at himself in the water again.‘As I thought,’ he said. ‘No better from THIS side. But…

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Merry Christmas 2019!

Merry Christmas friends! Christmas is my favorite holiday. Hands down. The tree goes up early and comes down late. All the tunes and the cozy hot drinks and the warm-fuzzy movies and the snowy walks. That’s not to say I’m never sad or stressed on Christmas. Christmas used to be sad and stressful for me, and now it’s just sad sometimes. Not so stressful, just kind of sad…

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Sometimes you’ve gotta feel

Sometimes you’ve gotta feel, gotta get emotional. At a seminar I attended last week, the speaker reminded us of a very real, very important fact of life, one that I know at least I forget a lot: You have to find inspiration. Like, inspiration with a capital I. Like deep emotional connection and feeling. He explained that’s why we listen to music, among other things. Or…

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7 Inspiring Quotes for Your Next Year

For some reason, Thanksgiving always brings out the new-year-spirit in me. Maybe because it seems like a time of thankfulness is a time of reflection and a time of reflection is a time for dreaming and inspiration. And maybe because I think a year ending deserves a whole month of reflection and appreciation and celebration. I’ve been reading a lot of other people’s words lately, looking…

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Say your stuff, no matter how messy

I hope you find these words from Carl Jung as inspiring as I do. They resonate so deeply with me. This is so big. Say your stuff, the stuff that that means the world to you, that you need to say, that you feel deep down, that you have to get off your chest, that you want someone to understand, that you just need to hear…

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Happy Thanksgiving 2019!

Happy Thanksgiving 2019! Last year I wrote that I thought that year was the oddest year of my life. I was wrong. This year. 100%. Odd isn’t bad, though. I have a lot to be thankful for. There’s all the usual, but there are some things I’m especially, newly thankful for this year. An odd year makes an odd list, I guess. Starting with this will…

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Put the shampoo bottle down

Do you remember having to take naps as a kid? Being forced to just lay there in silence for hours! Okay, probably like 30 minutes, but it felt like eternity. Do you remember the sound that silence made after a while? Like a wave or white noise machine, that deafening, on-going whoosh type noise. Almost as if you could hear your insides–heart beating, ear drums waiting for something to…

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Love

Love is not a finite resource. There isn’t a limited number of love things to pass around. Which means holding on tightly to the love inside you, instead of giving it away, isn’t the way to get love. At times I have felt like it is safest to not express all of the big love I feel–for my most special person, my special people, or just…

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Monsters until you flip the light switch on

~ Happy Halloween! What or who did you think was a monster until you flipped your light switch on? When we think that a thing is dangerous, unknowable, or scary, and we try to not look at it, it stays scary. It’s why, as kids, we think the stuffed animal under our bed or the shirt in the closet is a monster. They will only stop…

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Don’t wait for permission

Raise your hand if you often feel like you need permission to do something you’re inspired to do? I don’t know if it’s just certain types of people. Maybe it’s a part of anxiety. Maybe it’s from growing up in a family where most things weren’t considered a wise use of time. Maybe it goes hand in hand with a codependent need to focus on everyone else’s…

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Not Saying It

It feels like it will hurt LESS to NOT say what we want, than to SAY what we want and not get it. But that’s just not true. NOT saying it hurts WORST. To never express it, to smother yourself, to give up without a chance. That is the loneliest and the saddest, in the end. You are loved and your feelings are okay. You should…

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Endless Options and the Hopelessness of Getting it Right

Schitt’s Creek . . . The Great British Baking Show . . . Peaky Blinders . . . El Camino . . . Surf’s Up . . . Ancient Aliens . . . Mary Poppins Returns . . . You’re going to watch Netflix. Easy decision. Which show? Not so easy. How much time, on average, do you spend scrolling through Netflix options before settling on…

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To a little kid, little hurts are big and real

I want to speak up for a group of people that can’t really speak up for themselves. A group of little people. People who don’t get taken too seriously when they speak up. Because they’re “just” little kids. (Hey you, if you saw this title and clicked on this post because you were excited to shame someone you know, to make them feel bad for not…

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The problem with growing up

I feel compelled to be grown up all the way. But the problem is I get really happy every time I look down and see my blue sneakers with their yellow-green laces.

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If I could send a message to 18-year-old me

Do you ever imagine what you’d say to younger-you if you had the chance? Life is really wonderful and beautiful and full of magic and excitement and love. But life is also weird for each one of us, sometimes a really tough kind of weird. The kind of weird that can make you feel lonely and misunderstood. The kind of weird that makes it hard to…

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Colorado Rockies Adventure

“In every walk with nature one receives far more than he seeks.” ~ John Muir If there were one thing I could convince everyone to do more of, it would be going outside and being in nature. In the great outdoors you can find peace and rest, freedom and clarity, challenge and excitement, beauty and awe. So in the interest of inspiring as many people as…

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Dare to connect

There are lots and lots of people in the world. And all of them want friends. Everybody wants the really good kind of friends–the kind that support. The kind you can be real around. The kind that smile and hug and laugh. The kind you can call when you need. You’re not the only one who feels this deep need to make a friend, to connect.…

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